HELEN

fled' Gal Needs fidence in Self

Humrichouser

men like "Still

your own life. As to your questions:

(1) The circumstances involved would be the deter-

d "Just a Guy" mining factor about going

selves?

is

Since my profession mostly female-oriented, I miss just plain "man talk.' My friends say I am naive to hope that

male companHUMRICHOUSER ionship might develop into marriage. They say I am a fool to want to remarry eventually when my experience with my first husband should be proof enough that men don't want "good" women.

I am in my mid-40s, a college graduate, attractive and open to new ideas, but I believe there's plenty of fun to be had without becoming immoral.

I enjoy enough cocktails to relax and feel happy, but I've never been "stoned" in my life. I see nothing wrong. with going "Dutch" on dates, since many men cannot afford expensive entertainment.

In addition to the above comments I wanted to make, I would like to ask you these questions:

Is it acceptable for a woman my age to go to a man's apartment?

Is it acceptable for a woman to sit in a cocktail lounge (at a table, not a bar) for a pre-dinner cocktail?

When having dinner alone and a waitress tells me a gentleman, whom she points out, would like to buy me a cocktail, is this considered proper? If so, will he expect to join me at my table?

I am lost in today's society. My women friends tell me I should avoid going places with a woman or people will think I am a lesbian. My men friends tell me I should make it obvious to men that I am out for a good time and have no interest in marriage. Caught between these two philosophies, it would seem I'm not supposed to have any adult friends of either sex. Just what is considered acceptable behavior these days?

Dear Baffled:

Baffled

One thing you don't need is more advice. (Perhaps you could use some new friends!)

Quit worrying and enjoy yourself. You have good basic values so develop more self-confidence; run

to a man's apartment. If there a reason to go and you are in no doubt about the man's motives, go. (2) Sitting in a cocktail lounge alone for a a predinner drink is considered all right if the lounge in question is "respectable." This, too, would depend a great deal on circumstances. If you give the impression of being “a forelorn dejected individual,” you might invite unwanted attention.

(3) If you accept drinks from a strange man, you probably will find that he will expect more than to join you at your table. There are also exceptions in this case; when one is traveling, especially in foreign countries.